Steal Your Mail

You will cringe during this episode. Guaranteed. Hot Sauce.

HERE. WE. GO. You’ve got decisions to make and we’re here to help you make good ones. This week’s questions have been haunting men for ages. First up: How should you deal with a partner with different sexual openness than you? In question two, “Surfer Girl” asks us for advice on plastic surgery.. plastic surgery for love, really, is that the route you want to go? And last up, we source Reddit for what your own personal hell would look like. God knows, we’ve got a few ideas for you if you’re struggling.

Pro-Tip: Don’t look at it when you touch it (is that stolen from Jimmy Fallon?).

#expandyourboundaries #platformshoes #vanilla #diarytime #goldmine #copulation #sorrynotsorry #plasticsurgery #hotsauce #mypersonalhell #ihatemassage #hellforme #guantanamo #dontlookatitwhenyoutouchit #airportsecurity #punchingyourweight

But seriously: You will cringe.

Today’s Steal Your Mail panel: Steve, Les, Nate and Jo.

Episode 16 is, you know it, brought to you by Dirty City, Wildfire Solutions and the studs of On The Beat and Path. Thanks for listening!


Steal Your Mail

Oh, the things we could do on your couch..

Another week, another Steal Your Mail panel assembles to help you through your toughest life questions. This time around, we handle 2.5 tough questions and get interrupted by weather-related technical difficulties which force us into a temporarily relocating. First up: is it acceptable to have sex on your friends’ pullout couch? Perhaps even encouraged? As a follow-up, does Royal Dalton get you going like it does for Les? What about Royal Dalton plus a pullout couch? Secondly, what should you do if your child presents racist views? Ever the troopers, we tackle an even more complicated, Info Wars-entangled version of this question, just for fun.. (before the technical problems, that is). And finally, is it possible to grow a body part through massage? OK, OK, we know our male listeners have ideas about growing things through touching, but we’re talking more along the line of ling-lasting growth here.. you know, in the name of science.

Pro-tip: Listening to Steal Your Mail makes your brain grow.

#pulloutcouch #royaldalton #infowars #race #massage #science

Fun fact: Info Wars is not a great source for useable information.

Today’s Steal Your Mail panel: Steve, Andrew, Travis, Les, Nate and Brian.

Episode 15 is, per usual, brought to you by Dirty City, Wildfire Solutions and the studs of On The Beat and Path. Thanks for listening!


Steal Your Mail

Hey Fool – Hold on tight! Episode 14 is FLYING down the road.

Sometimes the grind of the SYM offices gets too much and we just need to get away for the weekend. But then, we also know that you’re craving Steal Your Mail episodes. So much guilt, so much love. We’re here for you. This week, Steve and Andrew take our high-tech studio on the road with co-host Andy – making sure that you get your fix of Steal Your Mail advice. Episode 14 covers fecal art (yep, it’s a thing), suggested time machine usage, dinosaur taming, and whether or not it’s normal to want to be tied up in sack.. and maybe a get a little kick every once in a while.

Pro-tip: There are right ways and very wrong ways to try and tame a T-Rex.

#poopart #doodieart #trexriding #throwasaddleonhim #berational #timespacecontinuum #isitnormal #laundryday #justakick

Historical Reference
Historical Reference
Fun fact: Cars traveling down the road make perfectly adequate podcast studios.

Today’s Steal Your Mail panel: Steve, Andrew and Andy.

Episode 14 is brought to you by Dirty City, Wildfire Solutions and the studs of On The Beat and Path. Enjoy!


Steal Your Mail

Phrase of the Day: Stable Genius

Have we got a show for you! This week, the Steal Your Mail team tackles the psychology of discussing flirtation with your better half (even if it was in dreamland), a rapid fire round that covers the realms of an attack of killer kindergarteners, the dangers of curiosity, plus the advantages of monocle wearing, and finally, Travis gets deep into a parenting conundrum of communicating with friends with overweight kids. Pro-tip: you’re going to want to be careful here.

Steal Your Mail goes broad this week in an effort to reach more of the questions of our base. Episode 13 looks like a winner. We can already hear the “Thank Yous” rolling in. #stablegenius #jimmythebartender #flirtation #jennifervaniston #BIIH #instafamous #kerfluffle #donteatthat

Fun fact: Doctor’s offices may have been the original Tinder.

Today’s Steal Your Mail panel: Steve, Nate, Travis, Andrew, Les and Brian.

E13 - Air Conditioner/Heater Unit Installation Episode 13 is brought to you by Dirty City, Wildfire Solutions and the studs of On The Beat and Path. Enjoy!

Also, we can’t find the picture referenced in today’s episode, but we love that you came to the website to look for it. [hugs]
Don’t worry, we dug around and found it for you! You can stop looking now. Click the thumbnail.. over there.. >>


Steal Your Mail

Fun fact: You will think of the title “Sister Act” differently after this episode.

The Steal Your Mail team is not one to shy away from the heavy questions. That’s why we’re here. That’s why you listen to Steal Your Mail. This week, we tackle: the complexity of dealing with Christmas with the awkward in-laws, some strategies for what to do if you impregnate sisters (eesh, that’s a hot tomale), and finally, how do you approach deciding on a long-term relationship with a racist partner.. sidebar: can’t we just do away with that bullshit? In any case, you can now consider these topics “former issues” in your life.. well, except the sisters question. That’s a lot to deal with.. probably forever. #inlaws #HectorAndAnges #babieswithsisters #sisteract #racism #theguysadouche #insecuricane #dontpeeontheseat

Fun fact #2: Cheese is pretty scary to some people. Also, do not accept Fromunda Cheese from anyone. (Listen on)

Today’s Steal Your Mail panel: Steve, Nate, Travis and Brian.

Episode 12 is brought to you by cheese, the Wildfire Solutions and the studs of On The Beat and Path. Enjoy!


Steal Your Mail

Take note: Dadvice is now a thing.. if it wasn’t already.

The SYM team head into the depths of the village for this week’s questions, which include: the biology behind interspecies breeding (guess how we rated that one, Florida Man), the deep dark psychology of the dirty mind, dealing with “mild” homophobia amongst friends, and finally, the first edition of Dadvice! #boobsonplanes #clothdiapers #bumguns #cherisheveryminute – You’re welcome, you unknowing lot you.

Want to impress your friends? Don’t ask these questions at a party. You’ve pretty much already won.

Today’s SYM panel: Steve, Les, Nate, Brian, Travis, Andrew, and guest host Rusty.

Episode 11 is brought to you by Wildfire Solutions and the studs of On The Beat and Path. Enjoy!


Steal Your Mail

It’s a big day for the Steal Your Mail team – Episode 10!
So many people to thank, so little time. For you though, we’ve got three special questions, and solid advice to bring them to heel.

You’re aging. That’s fine, but time’s ticking on the having kids front. Do you need to get your shit together before having kids, or just go for it? How does one transition to parenting exactly? Is it possible to keep any semblance of your previous life after kids?

Can you avoid social media in this day and age? What do you do if your partner wants to stay off the Twitter and the FaceBook, but you’re a budding InstaStar? Do we really want the Man scanning our faces and rifling through all our browser history?

Ageist we are not. The SYM team reaches out to a middle schooler needing help dealing with trust at home. You’ve been lying and now you’re dealing with it. How exactly does one dig out of a pile of bullshit they’ve been building up? Could communication be the key? Would a work camp be better?

In milestone Episode X, the Steal Your Mail team continues its crucial work saving citizens of the world from themselves. Bonus content: in question one this week, the SYM team performs a special rendition of the Paw Patrol theme. Our parent fans are gonna love it.

Want to impress your friends? The word “ten” is pronounced “shi” with an upward tone in Chinese. Look at you practicing that. You smartypants.

Today’s SYM panel: Steve, Andrew, Nate, Travis, Les, and guest panelists Wayne and Terry.

Episode 10 is brought to you by the new single from Dirty City, and the exploits of On The Beat and Path. Enjoy!


Steal Your Mail

The Internet never ceases to connect people in need. Hence the Steal Your Mail team.. we’ve got a lot of work to do.

This week:
Is it ok to have “Doggy Love”.. or be attached to the point you have jealousy when people pay attention to them? And either way, should you be rugby tackling a dog?

If you’re straight, is it ok to bring your partner to a gay bar and make out? Are you stepping over a line or infringing on space? Is it a “When in Rome” kind of thing?

Are you a dirty old man or just looking for solutions in the wrong places? How do you handle balancing your needs in a world caught between traditional values and increasing connectivity and exposure to different choices. What exactly is a sugar baby anyway? We got you buddy. Solid advice coming your way.

Join us for episode 9 of Steal Your Mail, where team is busy mining deep thoughts and coming up with golden nuggets of advice. Golden.

Today’s SYM panel: Steve, Andrew, Brian, Travis, Nate, and (a little bit of) Les.

Episode 9 is brought to you by the fine folks at Fella’s Bar. All musical interludes composed and performed by THE BENCHMARX.


Steal Your Mail

The vast Steal Your Mail audience has, shall we say, issues. Do not freak out SYM fans, we got you. This week, we tackle three biggies. Take a deep breath. If you meet the following criteria: 1) you’re the father of a blushing bride 2) you’re daughter’s best friend has a physical impediment, and 3) you’re an ass-hat, we have some advice for you! If you’re a budding professional worried about placement for your first unicorn tattoo, you’re going to want to hear this. Last but not least, if your family financial planning is loose enough for one partner to take out 125 grand without consultation, we’ll provide some unsolicited, legally non-binding, and overall questionable advice for that too.

Episode 8 coming at you with more solid SYM team advice to get you through these sticky life situations.

Today’s Steal Your Mail WiseGuys include: Steve, Les, Travis, Brian and Andrew.

Episode 8 introduces the new single from Dirty City, and is brought to you by the fine folks at the Gan Bei Liquor Room, Fella’s restaurant and bar and the musical prodigies from On The Beat and Path. Other musical interludes composed and performed by THE BENCHMARX.

Follow the Steal Your Mail team on Twitter too – @StealYourMail


Steal Your Mail

What should you do if your relationship takes a sharp nude trajectory? Where’s the best place to cut off the inappropriate picture with communication? How should you ask a girl’s parents for their daughter’s hand in marriage? And, finally, how in the hell can you talk to your parents about your sexual preferences? We are all over communication this time around.

Join us for episode 7, where the SYM team takes on these important, yet challenging situations with the tact you have come to expect. Don’t worry, we’ve got some solid advice for anyone else who finds themselves in such a situation.

Today’s WiseGuys include: Steve, Andrew, Travis, Nate, and Cara.

Episode 7 is brought to you by the fine folks at Wildfire Solutions and the musical prodigies from On The Beat and Path.

All musical interludes composed and performed by THE BENCHMARX.